Mapping of the conflict or upcoming negotiations. Conflict mapping method. The essence of the conflict; factors influencing the emergence of conflict; consequences of conflicts

Conflict cartography - displaying the subject of the conflict and the circumstances accompanying the conflict situation in the form of a map

(see Fig. 6.5) in order to analyze the possibilities for resolving the conflict. Its value lies in an orderly, systematic approach to a problem.

Rice. 6.5.

Cartography is carried out in several stages.

Stage 1. It aims to identify "What is the problem?". At this stage, it is necessary to describe the problem in general terms, without yet going deeply into the problem and without trying to solve it. For example, general description may result in the following generalized formulations: "load sharing", "communication", etc. It is not recommended to formulate the problem in the form of a double choice of opposites "yes or no", "this or that". Such a wording initially limits the freedom of choice, leaving only two solutions, while other alternatives may be identified during the discussion.

Stage 2. Who is involved? At this stage, the opposing sides are identified. Moreover, it can be either individuals or groups of people (for example, "management", "technologists", "accountants", etc.). If the people involved in the conflict have some common needs and interests, they can be combined on the map into one group.

Step 3: What are their real needs? The main needs and concerns for each of the main actors in the conflict should be listed. At the same time, the motives of behavior behind the positions of the participants in this matter are revealed. With a graphic display of needs and concerns, the view of the problem is expanded and conditions are created for finding options for solving it.

In this case needs can mean desires, values, interests, and in general everything that may be important to a person. As a need, “permanent work”, “work that brings satisfaction”, “respect from colleagues”, etc. can be named. Concerns reflect anxiety and concern. For example, "loss of control", "failure and humiliation", "loss of work". Category concerns actually completes the list of needs. It allows some people to formulate what they find difficult to pronounce as a need. For example, for some people it is easier to say that they do not tolerate disrespect than to admit that they need respect. All identified needs and concerns of the participants are recorded on the conflict map.

After the map is filled, it's time to analyze and search on it:

• new information. It may be something unnoticed or previously misunderstood. The map helps participants in the cartography process to see the situation through the eyes of another person;
• common to all needs and interests, which will serve as a "foothold" in the search for a solution to the conflict;
• values ​​or ideas common to all. If there are any, this brings the conflicting parties closer together in the process of finding a solution;
• hidden aspirations of the parties;
• the most difficult areas requiring urgent attention;
• basis for the mutual benefit of all parties.

All the information obtained as a result of the analysis can be used in developing options for resolving the conflict. Benefits of the Conflict Mapping Process:

• limits the discussion to certain formal boundaries, which usually helps to avoid excessive manifestations of emotions. People can lose their temper at any moment, but they tend to hold back during map making;
• creates a group process during which a joint discussion of the problem is possible;
• provides an atmosphere of empathy and acknowledges the opinion of people who previously believed that they were not understood;
• allows you to see more clearly both your own point of view and the point of view of others;
• gives a systematic character to the views of each side on the problem;
• leads to new directions in the choice of solutions.

Method name - cartography- appeared in Western literature due to the fact that incoming information, being ordered in a person’s head, forms his thesaurus, which, in detail on a geographical map displaying the area, can be recorded on paper. However, a thesaurus, like a map, is not a territory; it's just a sketch of reality. The more clearly for ourselves and others we can express what really exists in our thesaurus, the better we will be able to understand - this is our partner. Conversely, the more clearly the partner expresses this, the easier it will be to understand him. The proposed method of cartography is trying to bring together the "maps" of different people.

When talking about "clash of characters", people often don't know what drives other people. Conflicted or "difficult" people have their own thesaurus structure and their own "map", the description of which can help to communicate with them. Behind the ruffiness of a teenager, there may be a fear of being rejected by peers or a need to gain independence in making adult decisions, etc. Perhaps understanding this by a teacher or a parent will change the attitude towards him and at the same time solve the problems of his behavior. Claims for recognition can take place not only in adolescence, but also in adults, and sometimes it is only necessary to respond in a timely manner with praise, encouragement addressed to him in order to remove the problem. The method of conflict mapping proposed by the Australian psychologists X. Cornelius and S. Fair in the book "Everyone Can Win" is used as a means of analysis and introspection to resolve conflicts - interpersonal, intrapersonal, intergroup. It allows you to explicitly present the "maps" of the conflicting parties and identify those aspects that hinder adequate perception and understanding of each other.

This method can be used to resolve an emerging conflict or in a situation of making an important decision. Wanting to choose, for example, a profession, entering an educational institution or a job, going on vacation or hiking with friends, before discussing important business problems, i.e. in any case, when this decision affects personal or business issues or relationships that are important for a person, this method is useful.

The method of conflict mapping can help to make the right decision, and most importantly, prevent the occurrence of an unwanted destructive conflict. It can be resorted to alone with oneself, as well as solved with the participation of all interested parties. In the case of a sole decision, you only have to speculate about the intentions of the other party, but this process itself can lead to an expansion of your ideas and understanding of other people. The need for additional information will allow you to ask a partner or yourself a question in time and avoid mistakes. This method is used both at the planning stage and during the implementation of plans.

By creating cartography with the other side (at work at home or in a group), you can make explicit what interferes with agreement, what you disagree on. Cartography allows you to see a lot that could escape your attention. The needs of people, their attitudes and fears affect the behavior in the conflict and the attitude towards the partner.

Cartography allows us to see the "pitfalls" of our own needs or fears, often hidden from ourselves, distorting our perception of another person.

The value of this method lies in the ordering, systematization of the available information on a specific problem.

First stage - clarification of the essence of the problem and its brief designation. Describe the problem in general terms and describe it in two words (one phrase). At this stage, there is no need to go into the problem or look for a solution. If the problem concerns, for example, the fact that in a group someone “pulls the blanket over himself, i.e. enjoys everything, not wanting to make efforts on his part, then we can express this with the words "fair distribution of responsibilities in the group." If it is about clash and lack of trust, the problem can be labeled as "Communication". A problem that has arisen in the family related to washing dishes or a mess in the apartment can be labeled as “washing dishes” or “housework”. Don't worry just yet if this doesn't fully reflect the problem. It is important to determine the conflict itself, the schedule of which you will deal with. Remember that you should define the problem in the form of a yes or no, this or that choice. Then you will have the opportunity to find new and original solutions and label them differently. It is desirable to designate specifically, not too generalizing.

Second phase - identification of the parties, or participants, of the conflict. Identify the main actors in the conflict, which may include both individuals and groups (i.e. group or groups of students, teachers, director, parents of students, etc.). They can be grouped according to the degree of involvement in the conflict or their role in it. If, for example, cartography defines a conflict between students and one of the teachers of a school, it may include the teacher, students, director, parents, etc., although it may directly concern only the teacher and students. If you are mapping a conflict between two students, then you can include specifically Petya K. or Vasya T., having combined all the other students into one group, or you may have to include everyone by name and add the last name or first name of the teacher, head of practice, etc. to the list.

Third stage - identifying true needs. What are the main needs and concerns of each of the key stakeholders in relation to this issue. Needs in a broad sense - desires, values, interests, and in general everything that may seem important to a person. Needs can include: recognition and understanding, learning that brings satisfaction, an interesting permanent job, respect, etc., as well as quite material things - an apartment, a car, a specific book, a table, and even the ability to keep things in a mess, to do something - as you wish.

To identify needs, you can ask participants: “In terms of this problem ... what are your (their) needs?” This question can be asked to yourself, to other participants, or to both. Persistently asking each participant the question: “What would you like?”, “What else do you want?” Alternating with the question: “Why?”, Place the answers in the appropriate part of the table. If cartography is compiled by one person, then he is responsible for all the participants, trying to see the problem through their eyes, to read into their position. Questions: "What do you want?" - and after him: "Why?" - will help to identify the motivation behind the positions of the participants.

When it seems that this list has been exhausted, you can go around in circles, asking everyone the question: “What are you afraid of?” or “What are your concerns?” By writing down all the needs and concerns in each column, we expand the range of possible solutions and create conditions for more acceptable and effective solutions at the end of this process. Sometimes the views of participants can be so rigid and categorical that it is practically impossible to distract them from pre-prepared decisions. In order to shift attention to needs, it is useful to ask questions like: “Your decision is that we (they) should do such and such. What will it give you? The answer to this question will also help uncover implicit needs.

If the mapping process deviates from the intended goal or one of the participants intentionally takes it aside, you can interrupt the process by politely asking where, in his opinion, he can write down this need or fear, where he sees its place, and then continue the process by asking him to return back to where they left off before.

Fourth stage- cartography analysis. Sometimes the same need will be recorded in several or even all participants. In this case, it is worth emphasizing or somehow highlighting this need in order to show that all participants have common interests.

If there are common fears, for example, it often happens that people, in order not to lose authority, aggravate the conflict. Parents, afraid of losing their son's respect, "losing their authority", forbid the teenager to come later than the due date, and the teenager, claiming the same respect, demands the right to come when he sees fit, etc. Here it is important to see that common needs and interests can be understood.

Look for new information and new understanding - something that you didn't notice or misunderstood before. Cartography helps to see the situation through the eyes of another person.

Look for overlapping needs as a foothold.

Look for the same values ​​or ideas shared by all participants as a common point of view and support it.

Consider complementary values ​​and perspectives, that is, things that can lead to the formation of common views that are important at this stage only for one of the parties. So, for people protesting against breeding dogs and keeping them in city apartments, it is important to maintain cleanliness on the paths around the house, keep children's playgrounds in order, etc. It is also important for those who keep dogs to maintain cleanliness, keeping order, since dirt and debris are harmful to their dogs. At the same time, dog breeders do not take into account the fact that the owners themselves should clean up after the dogs. In order to bring the parties to agreement, it is necessary to move from agreement to disagreement.

Ideally, the overall vision should be broad enough to include the individual values ​​of all parties. For example, it is important for a parent that a child does homework, and it is important for a child to have time to play. Shared values ​​should include both.

Look for hidden needs, gains received by one side with certain solutions. Very often it can be feelings, a need for respect, recognition, reputation preservation. Highlight those hidden needs and concerns.

Look for the most difficult points that require urgent attention.

Look for those needs and concerns that have emerged unexpectedly and now require more detailed consideration.

Look for and stimulate prerequisites for winning for everyone. Identify elements that are important to one side, especially if your concession in this regard does not involve great sacrifices. Look for a win-win basis for all parties by offering solutions that include win-win elements for all.

Analyze the above remarks for yourself and discuss them with all participants. Then write down the issues that need attention when developing solutions.

When is it appropriate to use cartography with oneself?

Feeling confused and completely misunderstood how to act.

The hopelessness of the situation or a dead end in reasoning.

The state of being unable to make a choice due to the abundance of options available.

A situation of anticipation of something that is not completely clear.

Looping on some moments (resentment, anger, irritation).

When is it appropriate to use the mapping method with others?

To overcome difficulties and resolve conflicts in the family, with relatives and friends.

In preparation for business negotiations, as well as to bring them out of an impasse.

In preparation for divorce and division of property.

When resolving business problems in a group where there is a "conflict person".

in intergroup conflicts.

In anticipation of upcoming changes (for example, when planning a new educational program, a new course, making agreements between students and administration).

CARTOGRAPHY OF THE CONFLICT

After your emotional state has normalized so much that you are already able to use your reason, you can proceed to the analysis of the conflict. This analysis includes identifying, at a minimum, the following elements.

Participants: who is in conflict, what kind of people are they?

What are their requirements for each other?

What is their motivation: why do they need all this and how important is it?

What resources do they have to achieve the goal?

Based on the analysis, a decision is made on how to resolve the conflict and a consistent implementation of the chosen strategy is carried out until its completion.

INFORMATION

Conflicting, the participants make claims to each other's actions, trying to change the behavior of the opponent. These claims are made in the form of demands to change behavior, to stop or, on the contrary, to start any active actions. For example: "We will not allow propaganda of fascism ... You must remove the troops from our borders ... Give me back my money ... Stop drinking! .."

Meanwhile, behind the categorical requirements one can always find frustrated needs, the possibility of satisfying which the subject associates with the behavior of the opponent. Claims are expressed in the form of ready-made solutions offered to the opponent. To analyze the conflict, one must return to needs, manifested in needs and fears. R. Fischer and W. Ury proposed a method of negotiation based on the idea that it is always possible to find a number of solutions that best meet the interests of the parties. To do this, it is necessary to focus not on defending one's position, but on the four main elements of negotiations: people - their interests - options that satisfy these interests - fair criteria for accepting such options.

Thus, the first task of conflict analysis is to identify interests. Australian conflictologists X. Cornelius and S. Feir proposed an effective methodological method for analyzing a conflict situation: drawing up a “Conflict Map”. Have you ever dealt with a problem that makes you feel like this:

I'm confused. I can't figure out what's going on.

I'm stuck, I don't see any way out.

Where to begin?

I sensed that something else was going on, but I didn't know what.

The situation is hopeless - we just did not agree!

At such moments it is necessary to resort to the mapping of the conflict.

The map gives a clear picture of how things are arranged in relation to each other, makes it possible to see what might escape our attention. Before a conflict can be resolved, a map must be drawn up. This can be done in private or in meetings. The value of the map lies in the fact that it streamlines, systematizes the approach to the problem.

" Map"Represents a sheet of paper in the center of which the subject of the conflict is placed; each of the participants in the discussion is allocated a part of the sheet, where he writes down his requirements for the opponent, his interests and fears. The authors recommend the following areas of application of the map:

self-compilation in the analysis of the conflict (helps to reasonably choose a strategy for further actions);

mediated drafting to prepare a conflict resolution strategy;

drawing up during the negotiation process, in which all opponents take part (helps to establish constructive interaction between them, encourages cooperation).

A mediator helping to prepare for conflict resolution can

Stage 1. Definition of the subject of the conflict

Describe the problem in general terms. Express the problem in one general phrase. Why did the dispute arise, about what different opinions are expressed? No need to go deep into the problem or try to find a solution. Describe what is the subject of the conflict, using mostly nouns: not what needs to be done, but what is the “bone of contention”. There may be more than one item. It is better to draw up a separate card for each item, unless a general formula can be found.

For example: "Distribution of work", "washing the floor", "communication" Please note that the subject is not defined in terms of a dichotomous choice: either "A" - or "B". Do not worry if your statement does not immediately accurately reflect the essence of the problem.

Stage 2. Identification of opponents involved in the conflict

Decide who are the main parties in the conflict. Make a list of actors. If a group has homogeneous requirements, needs, it can be defined on the diagram as one person (schoolchildren, parents, teachers, administration ...). If the conflict is between 2 employees, then persons from their organization, the boss, may be included.

Stage 3. Determination of the true interests of opponents

The actions of people are caused by desires and the motives behind them. We strive for that which brings the satisfaction of needs closer, and avoid that which hinders this. The task of the third stage is to find out the motivation behind the satisfaction of needs or interfering with the satisfaction of needs. The needs and concerns of each participant should be listed. This creates opportunities to create more win-win solutions.

Count needs are understood in a broad sense and can include desires, values, interests, etc. You can directly ask the client: “What are your main interests (needs) in this situation? What would you achieve if your proposal was accepted? Respond in terms of a positive outcome: a permanent job, a tidy house, allowing things to be cluttered, legitimacy, understanding and acceptance, etc. The same need may apply to several or all participants. Then it is recorded by everyone, testifying to the commonality of interests. Don't confuse needs with solutions! The same need can be satisfied in different ways. Sometimes attempts to shift attention from decisions prepared by opponents to their interests are met with resistance: they continue to insistently express their demands. In this case, you can ask the question: “You offer your opponent ... And what will it give you personally?” You can't slide off the map.

Count concerns may include concerns, fears, anxieties. It is very important that the client gets the opportunity to express (express) their irrational fears. There is no need to discuss their realism here, you just need to put them in the appropriate column. Displaying fears on the map means acknowledging them. It must be remembered that the direct question "What are you afraid of?" can hurt the client's pride and provoke a response: "I'm not afraid of anything!" You can ask him: “Do you foresee that if your proposal is not accepted, something may happen in the future that you would not like. What can happen?" The subject of concern is often:

physical security;

financial losses; low salary; overpayment for the purchase;

rejection, loss of love, group membership; loneliness;

loss of control (power); unwillingness to be influenced, dependent on anyone;

loss of respect failure, criticism, condemnation; humiliation; fear of making a mistake;

loss of opportunity to realize oneself; uninteresting work.

Category concerns can be used to identify motivations not mentioned in the list of interests. For many, it is easier to say what they fear than what they want. For example, it is easier to say that you are afraid of disrespect than to admit that you need respect.

Conflict map

When drawing up a map, one should not be distracted by the consequences, ready-made solutions. It is important that the records reflect real life needs and concerns.

When drawing up a map, you can use paper, a board, chalk, felt-tip pens ... You can make a mental map before ... (conflict prevention). You can resort to the map when drawing up plans (to reduce costs, etc.). You can create a map in private, then you only guess about the problem, needs and fears of others. You can create a map with others (at home, at work, etc.).

When cards help:

close relations,

preparation for business negotiations,

negotiations stalled

property division,

group relationship difficulties

Mapping is a look into the future, a desire to identify alternatives. You need to apply the map to actual problems, and not to those that are subject to discussion. It makes no sense to map smoking when a decision has already been made not to smoke in the workplace. But you can map out the effects of smoking.

There is no need to conceal difficulties, concealment is worse than an autopsy. No need to roll on the personality "He has a difficult character"

To get the most out of your map making, consider the following guidelines for "map reading"

Look for new information and new understanding, something that you have not noticed or misunderstood before. The map helps you see the situation through the other person's eyes. Look for a common "foothold": common needs or interests.

Look for a common point of view and support common values ​​or ideas shared by all participants.

Combine different values ​​and perspectives. What values ​​and ideas can become part of the common vision because they are important to one of the parties? Ideally, shared views should be broad enough to capture the individual values ​​of all parties. For example, it is important for a parent that the child does homework, while it is important for the child to have time to play. Shared values ​​should include both.

Look for hidden aspirations, such as individual benefits accruing to one side of certain choices. Very often it may be just a desire to save one's reputation or prestige. Draw these hidden aspirations as additional needs and fears on the map.

Look for the most difficult areas that require urgent attention.

Look for notes. What did you not know before that requires more detailed consideration now?

Look for and stimulate prerequisites for winning for everyone. Identify elements that are important to one side, especially if your concession in this regard does not involve great sacrifices.

Look for a basis for mutual benefit for all parties.

Propose solutions that include win-win for all.

After identifying a fairly complete list of needs and concerns of the client, it is necessary to proceed to filling in the appropriate headings on the "field" of his opponent. This often causes difficulties, since many people do not think that others may have their own interests. That is why identifying the interests of the other is especially important. Ask the question: “What makes him insist on his own? How would you feel if you were in his place?

It must be remembered that the client, under the influence of the “bad man” illusion, is often inclined to ascribe base, socially disapproved motives to the opponent, explaining his actions by his moral defects. It is necessary to discuss what human needs are inherent in the opponent, what his needs can be frustrated if the client's requirements are met. In order to better understand the opponent's motives, one should also discuss the opponent's possible fears. After the “opponent's interests” field is filled in, it is necessary to clarify what of the described client knows for sure (for example, from the opponent's words), and what he only guesses about. It is necessary to clearly breed speculation and facts about the motivation of the opponent's actions.

Card benefits:

Limits the discussion to frames, avoiding unnecessary emotions.

2. A group process is created - a joint discussion of the problem.

People say what they need.

Creates an atmosphere of empathy.

Allows you to see your side and the other side more clearly.

Leads to new directions in the choice of solutions.

WORKSHOP

Objective

The study of the methodological technique "Conflict Map" to identify interests

conflicting parties.

Progress

Think of two conflict situations in which you were involved.

Draw a square in the center of the sheet and describe the subject that caused the conflict.

Describe what demands the parties made on each other at the beginning of the conflict

interactions.

4. Describe the needs and concerns of each party. Strive to be

at least five to six points are listed: the more interests affected

conflict, you will be able to identify, the more proposals for settlement

seminar. Find a comfortable seat and sit across from each other. You will take turns

play the roles of a psychologist and a client who consults about the emerging

conflict.

As a consultant, you help the client analyze the conflict. Your task is to help in mapping out his conflict by attentive listening, questions and comments. It is necessary to categorically refrain from assessing the behavior of the participants in the conflict, to maintain the most neutral position.

After the role reversal, tell your counselor about your own conflict.

Discussion and Conclusions

Share your impressions of the work done. Describe the experience you had with this exercise.

What role did the analysis of the interests of the parties play in understanding the conflict?

What experience have you gained in your role as a counseling psychologist?

What can you say about the merits of the method being studied, about its scope and its limitations?

Literature

DenaD. Overcoming disagreements. SPb., 1994.

CorneliusX., Fair Sh. Everyone can win. M., 1992.

Scott J.G. Conflicts and ways to overcome them. Kyiv, 1991.

Fisher R., Urey W. The path to agreement or Negotiations without defeat. M., 1990.

CREATIVE APPROACH TO CONFLICT PERCEPTION.

It allows you to turn a problem into an opportunity, which means extracting

maximum benefit from the situation.

/ STEP. "Reaction or Conscious Creative Response".

Reaction is impulsive behavior (examples: teaching, irritation, revenge, retreat)

Conscious response, thoughtful behavior occurs when you feel

master of the situation (self-control). To use it, you need to use all

2 STEP. "A look at the situation as it is."

It is necessary to accept, look objectively (once the problem is recognized, it becomes the most solvable). The way to change a bad mood is to recognize it as bad. ("Recognition of the true state of affairs").

A measure of perfection (thoughts about what the situation could ideally be are unproductive). For example, "She shouldn't talk to me like that", "He should do his job better." We measure people's behavior with our standards. And how often do we apply the measure of perfection to ourselves? (Chinese parable). ("Are you sure that you are right").

3 STEP. "What can we learn inthis situation."

It is difficult to go through life, relying on a staff made to the measure of perfection.

Look at situations. What it is, then what it can be! Search. "What am I

I can learn from this example."

BUT! Being creative doesn't mean glossing over difficulties. Pretending that everything is fine is putting a gloss on a rotten apple. It is useless to pretend that a mistake has been made that does not require correction.

You must rethink the situation and regroup forces. Turn annoyance into reason. The faucet leaked again, the heating was turned off, the seller scolded, the children came from the street dirty - you can shout, or you can learn a lesson.

Think about what you can do to prevent this from happening again.

See how you can benefit from this situation.

The fall is just as interesting as the next step (children learning to walk).

You can't avoid mistakes.

(The boss, who does not tolerate criticism, is surrounded by sycophants, the president with a tough

control is a condition for revolution).

Any mistake can be a great opportunity to learn something new. In win/lose tactics, losing becomes a new opportunity (life is not about winning and losing, but about winning and learning from losing). When you fall, you must remember where the pothole was so you can get around it next time. It is necessary to perceive what is happening as an experiment, then it is easier to accept a mistake (you won’t make a mistake, it won’t work). An example with the company Ai-Bi-em.

STEP. "Turning Conflict into Opportunity".

Task: what opportunities can be extracted (changing the angle of view).

Set positive beacons, (remove negative attitudes, expressions, use positive statements or dynamic self-hypnosis).

Redirect your energy to keep in touch with your partner, welcome the problem. (Everything will be fine, everything will work out for the better). Thought predetermines the outcome of the plan. An example, a party, a new project, being late for a meeting, breaking up with someone "What happens is the best thing for both of us."

Change negative attitudes to dynamic auto-suggestions (I can never tell him. I don't know how to tell him at the moment)

Open the doors of communication, don't close them.

Welcome the issue. (Example Sam was in in a good mood all day, after meeting someone - in a terrible mood). What's happening? Both participants absorb their energy, reduce their "aura". When we are healthy, happy... we radiate energy. Our energy extends beyond our body, ready to embrace any situation positively.

Theory. All living bodies radiate high-frequency energy. One of the proofs of this phenomenon is Kirlian photography. The basis is the theory of the English biologist Runert Sheldrake, who pointed out that even our thoughts and actions have an effect that goes far beyond our individual consciousness. When we react to a negative situation, we feel a drop in energy. It becomes "flat" or sluggish. This is because we have absorbed our physical and emotional energy in order to feel not only separate, but even separated from another person.

The result of the narrowing of energy is a feeling of depression, irritation, disconnection (sometimes we explain this by the influence of other people). Most people cannot control their energy, but it is possible. Signals of energy narrowing: 1) imagine unpleasant food in your mouth - your sensations. 2) a meeting with a pleasant person, 3) a person whom you do not like entered. This is training (you will be able to direct energy in a different direction, keep signals of energy narrowing under control).

Input: 1) stay in touch (if you feel energy drain). 2) try to expand the energy field when you are in a meeting full of hostility if you decide to take it in another direction.

Direct your energy so that you stay in touch, be open and widen the scope of your energy instead of narrowing it down. Radiation of energy outside - a beam reflected by a mirror can illuminate even the darkest corner. Warm those around you with your inner light. Go towards conflict, not like a tank with battened down hatches.

The essence of the approach to conflict as to undiscovered opportunities:

expand your energy, revise negative thinking

use energy to maintain rather than break contact

Materials for negotiating

Big Gray

You are the Big Grey. All your ancestors lived in this forest, which was once large, there was where to roam in search of food. There was a large Village at the edge of the forest, but its inhabitants did not disturb your flock.

Now the situation has changed. The village has grown and merged with the city, most of your forest has been cut down. The villagers hunt the Great Gray and at one time were even well paid for the skins of your relatives. There is little food left in the preserved part of the forest, so you have to go to the outskirts of the city and sink to the humiliating theft of food from the townspeople.

Created in the city new service: she mediates in solving urban problems and disputes. You hope that with its help you will be able to achieve attention to your problem. You were invited, guaranteeing complete security. You go to meet the mediator and Little Red.

Little Red

You are Little Red. You live in a city surrounded by forests. You live with your mother, your family is of modest means. Mothers have to work hard to make ends meet. You have a grandmother. She lives in the former Village, now merged into the city. Grandma is very independent and wants to live separately in her own house. However, over the years, her health has given up, it is increasingly difficult for her to manage alone, to cook her own food. Therefore, you wear her daily dinners. The only road through the park, which was once a forest, leads to the grandmother's house. You have heard that there are still Big Grays in the woods, and they sometimes come into the park. You are afraid of them, but you won’t admit it to your mother, because your mother already has enough problems and a sick heart. Yesterday, when you were going to your grandmother, Big Gray unexpectedly approached you and asked for food. You tried to get rid of him, but casually let slip about the purpose of your campaign. When you came to your grandmother, you noticed that she was lying in bed, and she looked unusual.

Grandma started asking questions. They seemed strange to you and they all strove to snatch the dinner they brought from you. Looking closely, you saw that it was not a grandmother, but Big Gray.

You screamed out of fear, builders ran up to the scream and drove Big Gray away.

A new service has been created in the city: it mediates in solving various city problems. You were invited to speak with the Big Gray at your mutual request to sort out the problem.

You heard that the Big Gray is having a hard time, he is starving, the forests are too close to the city. There is nothing to eat. However, you are concerned about your problem: will you be able to carry lunch to your grandmother, not be afraid of being robbed, frightened, as it was recently.

GAME "RESOLUTION OF CONFLICTS"

Plan

The first part is informational. The trainer announces the topic of the lesson. Talks about the importance and complexity of the problem. Offers theoretical information about the concept of conflict, its types, structure, dynamics, resolution strategies.

The second part - Discussion of the History of the Crocodile River.

First stage.

The trainer invites each participant to independently read the proposed story.

The Story of the Crocodile River

Once there lived a woman named Abigail. She was in love with a man named Gregor. He lived on one side of the river, and Abigail lived on the opposite side of the river. The river that separated them was teeming with voracious alligators. Abigail really wanted to cross the river.

Unfortunately, the bridge over the river was washed away by the flood. Therefore, Abigail went to Sinbad, he was the captain of the ship, and asked to be transported across the river. He said that he was ready to help her if she agreed to spend the night with him as a condition for transportation. Abigail immediately refused and went to Vanya and told about her dilemma, but she did not receive any advice in the current situation.

Abigail felt that there was no alternative and she had to accept Sinbad's condition. Sinbad, in turn, also kept his word and delivered it to Gregor. When she told Gregor about her journey and everything connected with it, Gregor dismissed her with contempt.

Abigail returned home heartbroken and sad. She told Slug her story. Slug, feeling compassion for Abigail, found Gregor and beat him up. At sunset, Abigail's laughter could be heard.

Second phase.

Further, on the basis of the emotional-rational relationship that has arisen, each member of the group fills in the first column of the table. All heroes must be placed in the columns of the table corresponding to ranks from 1 to 5. The first rank is assigned to the hero who causes the greatest sympathy, the fifth - respectively, to the hero who causes the least sympathy (for example, see table 1). The texts of the story and the forms with the table are distributed to the participants in advance.

Table 1.

After filling in the table individually, the trainer offers to fill in the general table for the whole group. In this case, only the extreme answers are counted (the number of 1st ranks, and the number of 5th ranks) (see Table 2, it can be drawn in advance on a drawing paper or board).

Table 2.

After that, the trainer invites the participants to discuss the story in pairs. The group is divided into pairs, a discussion takes place, during which the task of the participants is to try to convince the interlocutor of the correctness of their position, using various arguments. After the discussion, the ranks are again placed in individual tables, then the overall results are entered in the final table.

Third stage.

The group is divided into 2 subgroups. The first subgroup should describe only the positive qualities of each character, and the second - only the negative ones. Then there is a discussion, each group should argue the selected qualities, try to justify them.

Practice shows that in groups the same information is used during discussion to highlight clearly opposite qualities. The trainer suggests discussing: what is the reason for this?

The group makes assumptions: with the installation, insufficient information, using personal experience, etc.

Fourth stage.

The trainer gives some additional information (it can be invented by the trainer): Abigail is a 70-year-old woman, Gregor is a 26-year-old man. Van is a woman. Slug is a one-legged cripple, Sinbad is a 40-year-old man. After this information, there is again a discussion in the group, the attitude towards the heroes is ranked, the results are recorded in individual tables and in the general one.

Practice has shown that the position of the group during the discussion has become more categorical. After additional information, new stereotypes began to work.

Fifth stage.

At this stage, the coach steps away from the main story and invites the group to discuss the problem that was revealed during the game. This may be a problem of honor, gossip, guessing information, etc. The group is divided into subgroups of 4-5 people. Each of the subgroups first discusses this problem, then the representative of each subgroup submits the opinion of his subgroup to the discussion of the group as a whole.

Sixth stage.

Continued discussion of history. Participants are invited to continue the story (the story is distributed to each participant individually).

Crisis in Alligatortown

One day, after the events at Crocodile River, the bridge was eventually built and life seemed to return to normal in Alligatortown.

Sinbad had more free time as the bridge was rebuilt and no one needed to be transported. He whiled away the time in a local pub, telling various stories from his life to his friends. He told the story with Abigail and also about the moments they spent together.

Abigail learned that her private life had become a public moment of discussion. This hurt her honor and she went to the police and filed a lawsuit against Sinbad. Gregor also went to the police and filed a complaint against Slug for violence. Slug, in turn, stated that Gregor was the first to start everything and went to the clinic for an examination to protect himself.

Sinbad's son was severely beaten in school yard, the audience also suffered in the brawl. Rumors began to circulate that this beating was not accidental and was ethnically motivated. The Zorians (the ethnic group to which Sinbad's family belonged) and other minority groups in the city demanded an investigation into the incident.

Tensions began to rise in the city as people took one side or the other. In the evenings, supporters of one group or another began to gather on the corners. The situation was heating up.

Vana, the chief administrator at the mayor's office, reported the dangerous situation to the mayor and he called an additional police force from the center. The Center advised a meeting before taking any action.

The mayor, concerned about the escalation of the conflict, called a meeting of advisers.

After getting acquainted with the situation, the group members are invited to discuss this conflict, analyzing it according to the scheme:

main actors;

key points of the dispute;

participants' motives;

the history of this conflict;

phases of the conflict;

contemporary conflict situation.

Seventh stage. Conflict resolution through the negotiation process.

The trainer asks the group to break into subgroups of 4 people. The task is to distribute the roles (Gregor, Slug, neutral side, observer), to negotiate. Slug and Gregor play roles from the proposed role-playing game, the neutral side organizes their interaction, the observer fixes the positions of the parties, the actions of the mediator. This is followed by group discussion. First, all the “Slugs” and “Gregors” speak out, then the “neutral side”. In conclusion, the observers talk about what they saw and heard, draw conclusions about the possible strategies of behavior of each of the parties, the mistakes of the neutral side. Further, it is desirable that in the subgroups everyone has been in all the proposed roles (you can first everyone will be in all the roles, and then the discussion). After that, the trainer invites the whole group to participate in the negotiation process. Slug, Gregor, the "neutral side" is chosen. The rest of the group members are observers. It is advisable to choose either a competent person in the field of conflict resolution or having successful experience in mediation for the role of the "neutral side". After that, the group discusses according to the scheme described above.

Role-playing game

Gregor and Slug

What everyone knows:

Gregor reported to the police for being beaten by Slug. Slug stated that Gregor started first and went to the clinic to get the document to be on the safe side. The Court had a new practice of doing business, which was agreed and approved by both parties.

Gregor and Slug have known each other almost all their lives. They went to the same school, but were from different social classes and never got along.

Gregor lived in Alligator Heights and his father owned a company that was the main employer in Alligatortown.

Slug has been unemployed since the bridge was built. Slug never had any problems with the police, and he was not registered.

Proposed positions for Gregor and Slug

Possible general interest:

The chance of Slug going to jail is very low. However, if he is registered with the police, getting a job will become problematic. It is certain that Gregor was beaten, but it is not clear how innocent he is. Gregor spends a lot of money on anonymous medical treatment, and his father would probably like to know where his son spends his money. Gregor doesn't want his father to find out, of course.

The role of the mediator (neutral side)

Greets (with respect and attention), explains his role, the basic rules of negotiations, invites to start negotiations.

Encourages participants with questions about the history of the conflict, feelings of participants, common interests.

Actively listens, encourages the parties to actively listen to each other, improves positive energy.

Not a judge, not an adviser. The mediator has a mandate to assist in the process (responsibility for the process, not the result).

Supports positive-oriented process (safe venue)

Observation sheet for the activities of the "neutral side" in the negotiation process (for the observer).

Place (preparation of the room), position (arrangement of chairs), presence (presentation).

Presentation and ground rules (representation, announcing your role, asking the parties to introduce themselves, explaining the process and progress of mediation, obtaining instructions and permission, obtaining agreement with the ground rules).

Creating an atmosphere of safety and goodwill (reminding, if necessary, the basic rules, maintaining one's authority, openness of the "neutral side", respectful treatment of the participants).

Listening skills (effective listening, helping parties to listen to each other, to give recognition to ideas and feelings).

Regulation of the process (to follow no longer the content, but the process, express reasoning without judgment, the direction of the process, not the result).

Eighth stage. Final.

Summing up, discussion of the results of the game.

It is necessary to know how the conflict develops (the history of the conflict). If the manager "enters and manages the conflict" in the initial phase, it is resolved by 92%, if during the rise phase - by 46%, and at the peak stage - less than 5%, at the decline stage - about 20%, at the stage of the secondary period of growth - less than 7%, at the secondary peak stage - less than 2%.

Find out the hidden and obvious causes of the conflict, determine what really is the subject of disagreement, claims. Sometimes the participants themselves cannot or do not dare to clearly articulate the main cause of the conflict.

Focus on interests, not positions. Interests are what prompted us to make this decision. They are the key to solving the problem.

Make a distinction between the participants in the conflict and the problems that have arisen. Be soft on people and hard on the problem.

Treat the initiator of the conflict fairly and impartially. Do not forget that behind dissatisfaction and claims there is a rather significant problem that weighs on a person.

Do not expand the subject of the conflict; you cannot immediately understand all the problems. Reduce claims.

Adhere to the rule of "emotional restraint".

Code of Conduct in Conflict

Let your partner blow off steam.

Ask him to substantiate his claims.

Knock down aggression with unexpected tricks. (for example, ask for advice from a conflicting partner, ask an unexpected question about something completely different, but significant for him, make a compliment: “You are even more beautiful in anger”, “Your anger is much less than I expected, you are so cold-blooded in an acute situation” ).

Do not give negative assessments, talk about your feelings: not “You are deceiving me”, but “I feel deceived”; not "You are a rude person", but "I am very upset by the way you talk to me."

Ask them to frame the desired end result and problem as a chain of obstacles.

Invite the partner to express their views on resolving the problem and their solutions.

Reflect as an echo the meaning of his statements and claims.

Hold on as if on a knife edge in an equal position.

Don't be afraid to apologize if you feel guilty.

You don't have to prove anything.

Shut up first.

Do not characterize the state of the opponent.

When you leave, don't slam the door.

Speak when the partner has cooled down.

Regardless of the outcome of the conflict resolution, try not to destroy the relationship.

Not possible in a conflict situation

Critically evaluate your partner.

Ascribing base or bad intentions to him.

Show signs of superiority

Blaming and attributing responsibility only to the opponent.

Ignore his interests.

See everything only from your position.

Reduce the merits of the partner, his contribution.

16 For those who want to get a demographic education MASTER In June- July2009 years... of education from regions of the Central, Southern, Northwestern, Volga Federal Districts, Khabarovsk the edges, RepublicNorthernOssetia-Alanya ...

1. Central Federal District 2

   Document

   Included in the Southern Federal District: Republic Dagestan, ChechenRepublic, Republic Ingushetia, RepublicNorthernOssetia-Alanya, Republic Kabardino-Balkaria, Karachay-Cherkess Republic and Stavropoledge. In this direction...

Here we look at three examples of conflict mapping:

■ The first example in Figure 2.3 on the previous page shows what a simplified conflict map might look like. Try to map the situation you are currently working on. You can ask yourself questions such as:

Who are the main participants in this conflict?

What other parties are involved in or in any way related to the conflict, including marginalized groups and external actors?

What are the relationships between these parties and how can they be represented on a map? Union? Close relationship? Ended relationships? Confrontation?

Are there key issues in the relationship between the parties that should be mapped?

Where are you and your organization located in relation to these parties? Do you have any connections that can provide an opportunity to get started in the situation?

■ A second example, this time of conflict within the family, is shown in Chart 2.4. The main conflict here is between father and daughter over an arranged marriage. Notice the thickness of the line used to represent the close relationship between grandmother and granddaughter, the broken relationship between father and mother, and the estrangement between the two brothers due to sympathy for different sides of the conflict despite a generally close relationship. This example shows how cartography can be adapted to suit different situations.

Although cartography is used in this example to depict the participants in a family quarrel, it can also be used in describing

large-scale conflicts - for example, conflict between members of a community, and even within a country or between countries.

B The third example, presented in figure 2.5 on the previous page, shows an analysis of the situation in Afghanistan from the point of view of a small local NGO. It illustrates the conflict between the Taliban government and opposition forces. Studying the map, it is easy to determine the main actors and the relationship between them. While the conflicting relationship between the Taliban and the opposition (indicated by the thick zigzag line) is main theme conflict and the cause of the civil war, some other relationships are also important and should not be overlooked in the analysis of the situation.

You could, as shown here, use rectangular boxes to indicate the views of the main participants. By demonstrating differences in perception of context, this will help you find starting points for dealing with conflict. It may seem that other, less powerful parties, such as civic groups or businessmen, have no direct influence on the situation, but by including them in the map, you make sure that all possible ways of intervention are considered. The organization from whose point of view the map is drawn has been placed on the map where it sees itself - "our group". It is linked to aid organizations and works closely with civic and community groups. We will return to this example in Chapter 4, where we will consider how a map can be used to find the start of an intervention.

However, the conflict map alone cannot provide all the answers. Like other methods,

it only partly illuminates the nature of the conflict. Often there are deeper problems underlying the observed relationships. The subsequent methods of analysis can give insight into how to uncover such hidden causes.

They happen at every turn. For some, there is a logical explanation, others occur for unknown reasons, causing misunderstanding on both sides. By turning to, you can creatively reveal all the hidden motives and true causes of any conflict that has happened or is brewing.

concept

Conflict mapping is a psychological method that helps to understand the causes of conflict behaviors and situations. This method is called cartography, because all the information entering the brain is able to be ordered in it, like countries on a geographical map of the world.

The essence of the method

The conflict mapping method consists of several stages, which are carried out using a graphical representation of the analyzed data. The design can be anything from a regular table to a colorful scheme. You can also choose between a regular notepad and an electronic editor.

Each of the stages is aimed at identifying the true causes of the conflict, formulating the main problems, identifying fears and claims. This should eventually lead to the fact that the conflict will be resolved.

Phased and detailed analysis will help one party to understand as clearly as possible the nature of their behavior and convey it to the second participant in the conflict. The same is true and vice versa - if the opponent can successfully analyze the existing problems, he will be able to rationally explain this to you.

How can conflict mapping help?

This psychological technique is suitable for resolving an existing conflict, as well as a brewing one. Such cases include situations in which the tension of the partners becomes obvious, but so far no one has expressed their dissatisfaction and claims. It's a matter of time, a kind of time bomb. To avoid unpleasant consequences, it is worth at the initial stage to try to prevent an approaching conflict situation.

Also, this method is used to choose the right solution in a difficult life situation. Any tasks and decisions that may affect later life often cause doubts and uncertainty. To make the right choice, you can refer to this method.

The analysis of the conflict by the method of cartography can be carried out both by one person and with the help of everyone who is involved in it and is interested in its speedy end. The participation of all parties will help to take a closer look at all the components of the conflict. While a single analysis can only create guesses as to what drives the other person.

Stage one. Identification of the main problem

If the reasons are not always hidden on the surface, then the very essence of the problem is usually obvious. To begin with, it is worth voicing it and assigning it a name of several words. The initial stage is not designed for a deep analysis of the problem, the search for causes and solutions. Even if it is not immediately possible to identify clear difficulties, you can turn to a generalized form, but try to be more specific.

Any sphere of life can serve as an example of conflict mapping at the first stage. If the conflict occurs in a romantic relationship, the problem can be called a "misunderstanding." If a married couple fights over cleaning the house, the problem can be labeled as "the distribution of household chores." If the conflict occurs with the boss due to the fact that he does not give you a more serious and meaningful project, the problem may sound like "uncertainty in professional skills."

Stage two. Identification of persons involved

It is necessary to identify each person who is related to the conflict. It can be either one person or a whole group of people. If the number is impressive, for convenience, everyone can be divided into categories, depending on the significance of each person.

For example, the cartography of a pedagogical conflict at this stage may include several groups. The conflict could have occurred both through the fault of only two teachers, and with the participation of outsiders. These may include students or the head of the educational institution. In this case, all participants should be divided into categories: the main person is another teacher, secondary persons are the director and students. It is worth signing each member of the group if necessary.

Stage three. Definition of needs

At this stage of conflict mapping, it is necessary to identify the needs and doubts of each stakeholder regarding the current problem. Each person may have different needs, they include: the desire to be heard and recognized, career growth, respect from colleagues, mutual understanding with loved ones, interesting activities, receiving an award, and in general everything that in one way or another has value and significance for an individual person .

To find out the needs of each participant, it is worth asking the following questions:

• Given the current situation, what are your needs?
• What do you want?
• What are you still missing?

After each question asked that has an answer, ask:

• Why do you want it?
• For what?

Once the needs of each participant are identified, it is worth learning about the fears by asking questions:

• What is confusing you?
• What are you afraid of?
• And why?

Each identified need and concern should be recorded in the appropriate column.

Stage four. Analysis of the work done

Finding themselves at the last stage of conflict mapping, many notice that the experiences or needs are the same for both participants, even if it is not one person, but a whole group. Any similar answers must be highlighted, this will make it clear that both conflicting parties are able to understand each other.

• Pay attention to what has become new information for you, previously unknown.
• Find common needs that will serve as a foothold.
• Highlight similar interests and values ​​shared by all stakeholders.
• Find points that can be changed in a positive way, which will eventually lead to the consent of both people.
• Summarize individual values ​​into a shared interest. For example, a manager needs a daily plan to be completed, and an employee needs outdoor recreation to replenish energy. Both of these moments can be combined in one working day.
• Highlight the most problematic areas of the conflict, considering and voicing all sorts of options for resolving this problem.
• Pay attention to those needs and doubts that come as a surprise to you. Think about what you can do with them.
• Determine the reward that both parties will receive if the conflict is resolved. For example, if the husband stops smoking in the apartment, the air will become cleaner and more fragrant.

Analyze each response received, discussing it and the options for a solution with a second interested party.